A Love Letter by Statistician

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My dear love,

Before seeing you, my heart is a null event but after your first jhalak, when I applied chi-square test for goodness of fit, my heart is crowded with infinitely many emotions. Let me clear that in order to avoid the sampling errors which are unavoidable. I have chosen you deterministically and not randomly. Not to forget that I have made your selection from a very large sample size.

My analysis shows that variance between us is zero and correlation (even not statistically possible) tends to infinity. The critical region for my love for you does not exist hence null hypothesis will be always accepted, which is obviously ‘I LOVE YOU’. My love is free from assumption (or say condition) like a non parametric test, provided ‘YOUR PAPA HAS NO OBJECTION’.

I assume myself as an unbiased & unique lover of you. The confidence limit for my love is a whole real line. I think you are sufficient for me.

While writing this letter my B.P. is Normal but it may rises exponentially, if hypothesis is rejected. But I think probability of accepting the hypothesis will be almost one.

By keeping my hand on the statistical table, I pledge that my love for you will remain continuously Uniform & Consistent.

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